Well here we go again with that good old universal constant...change.
Underemployed, living in a temporarily good living situation and looking at new horizons. The company that I started with three other guys is still active. My role seems to be somewhat diminished. I am not sure of the next steps of things with that. Lots of stuff that is not what it should be I think, which of course brings me to my mindset of doing things for myself by myself.
I don't want to say that the last two years has been a waste because I have learned two years worth of producing and business that I cannot say I would get anywhere else. What I do know for sure is that I need to be in charge of what I am doing next as much as I can. That is, the next thing that I own I am not going to have any partners and not have anyone else above me making the major decisions. I don't mean that I wont partner with people on projects or work with people. I am simply saying that if it's a matter of a business I own. The buck stops here, or I am not involved.
Which means what?
No equity investment but myself. Well that means I need to get money myself, so that means I have to get back to work. This feels amazing. All of the "if's" associated with the company from last year can go good or bad. Either way I win, either way I am set up for what is next. It's been a rough January, but like all things hard, I seek to be grateful about how much I have learned.
Monday, January 11, 2016
Tuesday, October 13, 2015
New story
Was up late working on a pitch packet for this project my colleges and I have been building for awhile now and it occurred to me that this story I have been mulling over is finally ready to write. It's exciting but I am struggling to come up with a name for it.
Will put this up on The Castle Muse page as soon as I can get this email situation figured out.
Aeon I like this name for the main character, because of it's meaning. Kinda cool name for the series or the book not sure.
Aeon Corps.
Aeon Galaxy Corps.
Aeon Galaxy Scouts, Aeon
Three planets in a system that all contain sentient, developed civilizations at different levels of development. All within sub-light speed distance of each other. In fact the three planets are so close to each other that each thinks the other two are moons until the most modern of the three begins to develop astronomy and observe.
The first planet is a -2 planet is Seeped in Newer Star energy based Magic and the "Star Royalty" "gods" presence is strongest there very few titans left. Most developed Civilization has Airships and magic assisted flight. This planet is closest to the systems star.
The second is a -4 planet is ruled by Titans and Dragons and Various Humanoid Empires some Star Royalty Presence. The Titans still are the main "gods" on the planet and the magic is older here. Dragon Ancients may have traveled between worlds. Some evidence of Galactic Class Star Behemoth activity on this planet.
The third is type 0 civilization. Almost to the Hyper modern era. Pre Global information system, some aerospace development from the most advanced civilizations. Humans and elven species dominate world. Advance Projectile weapons, and Meta-humans beginning to emerge. Almost no Titan level species present, Star Royalty presence less than 5 Alpha's detected on the whole planet.
Planet three is furthest from the systems star and has the largest ellipses, has the most moons, 3. One seems to show signs of Titan activity.
Will put this up on The Castle Muse page as soon as I can get this email situation figured out.
Aeon I like this name for the main character, because of it's meaning. Kinda cool name for the series or the book not sure.
Aeon Corps.
Aeon Galaxy Corps.
Aeon Galaxy Scouts, Aeon
Three planets in a system that all contain sentient, developed civilizations at different levels of development. All within sub-light speed distance of each other. In fact the three planets are so close to each other that each thinks the other two are moons until the most modern of the three begins to develop astronomy and observe.
The first planet is a -2 planet is Seeped in Newer Star energy based Magic and the "Star Royalty" "gods" presence is strongest there very few titans left. Most developed Civilization has Airships and magic assisted flight. This planet is closest to the systems star.
The second is a -4 planet is ruled by Titans and Dragons and Various Humanoid Empires some Star Royalty Presence. The Titans still are the main "gods" on the planet and the magic is older here. Dragon Ancients may have traveled between worlds. Some evidence of Galactic Class Star Behemoth activity on this planet.
The third is type 0 civilization. Almost to the Hyper modern era. Pre Global information system, some aerospace development from the most advanced civilizations. Humans and elven species dominate world. Advance Projectile weapons, and Meta-humans beginning to emerge. Almost no Titan level species present, Star Royalty presence less than 5 Alpha's detected on the whole planet.
Planet three is furthest from the systems star and has the largest ellipses, has the most moons, 3. One seems to show signs of Titan activity.
Friday, September 18, 2015
Around the Bend...
This doesn't always make sense, in fact you might say that it literally is part of the clinical definition of insanity.
But the next big thing in my life is ..."just around the bend".
Of course it's been said simplistically that clinical insanity is partly defined as doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results. Which is only part of the definition but the part that is often quoted the most.
I guess what I am really talking about are these cycles of hope that I seem to live off of day after day.
Continuous faith (no other word can describe this) that better things are coming.
But the next big thing in my life is ..."just around the bend".
Of course it's been said simplistically that clinical insanity is partly defined as doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results. Which is only part of the definition but the part that is often quoted the most.
I guess what I am really talking about are these cycles of hope that I seem to live off of day after day.
Continuous faith (no other word can describe this) that better things are coming.
Saturday, September 5, 2015
Podcasti stuff, 4 hours...
Basically my day was a bunch of meeting this morning then social media iNet stuff. Then I get a call about doing podcasts, how much are they etc etc. I thought ok, mic, mixer, streaming service, video, editing, etc. $2-5k depending on the equipment...then I did more research...NOPE $100.00 for bare bones...Yeah I need to do the podcast for myself like right now...
Got 4 hours of sleep in the middle of the day, no sleep last night...working/writing all night. AAAAnd I feel great.
Got 4 hours of sleep in the middle of the day, no sleep last night...working/writing all night. AAAAnd I feel great.
Guts and a Bright Futue
Right now I am really glad I have this blog. Even though not many people are reading it, it's still getting done. Someday I hope some of all of this means something. It's strange, but ten years ago I firmly believed that the only proof I existed was the hand written novel outlines I had in a backpack that I was wondering through some California deserts with. Yes I was homeless, not for a super long time, but I was in a really bad way for several years. No, not drugs or Alcohol, it was just how my life was going at the time. The specter of that time in my life always haunts me. My test of guts.
It's like I know it can happen, because it did, so it can happen again.
Yet I feel like I am fighting constantly to...evolve. Change is not a big enough word. My situation, my place in life must get better. So, I am sacrificing constantly, every day. Everyday what I am making is what I believe is steady, incremental movement towards that permanent life evolution that makes it so the homeless time of wandering wont' happen again. At least as much as anyone can control that.
This is the crazy part, the thing that is keeping me up.
It's over.
I did it, it just hasn't kicked in yet.
I put together a team and we have found some things that are going to change everything for us. And no, it's not one movie that is going to save the day. Yes I still work in that business, and yes I have movies/tv shows that are in my future. But this is something else.
I can't actually say specifically what it is, just that my team is continuing its Vett and we maybe on a 3 month window to permanent evolution.
The absolutely nuts part of this part is that so many other things are going crazy right now and could be seen as bad. More than that, whats really cool. Is that I am juggling a ton of different stress, and stressed out people. 6 months ago got me prepared for this time. I am growing and learning so much and it's paying off almost every week.
I am leading multiple teams, and groups of people through several different things. From business to family issues(that have never ever come up before, too strange.)
On the bad side, I don't live in my own house, I have no car, I have a suspended license, my cell phone is about to be shut off, and my girlfriend now lives 2 hours away from me. Cell phone is the latest thing, but I have a feeling that's going to be remedied soon. Everything else has been an issue that has been workable for months now. The girlfriend and I just had our 2 year anniversary and I couldn't be happier. Distance is being worked out! This bad side stuff is going to super gone in three months, I am fairly confident if not then very soon after that time frame.
All of this stuff is banging around in my head and I should be freaking out, but I just am not. I keep thinking about the color of the carpet in the office I am going to have...(am chuckling as I write this) I really want to do the Ogilvy &Mather classic English Red...maybe a deeper maroon...who knows. What a silly thing to keep you up until 4am.
When they ask me what the first thing I did was when this all happened, I will say "Got new carpet"
Wow, now I can't sleep because I want to get to work...
Why not, the future is really bright and so is this sunrise.
It's like I know it can happen, because it did, so it can happen again.
Yet I feel like I am fighting constantly to...evolve. Change is not a big enough word. My situation, my place in life must get better. So, I am sacrificing constantly, every day. Everyday what I am making is what I believe is steady, incremental movement towards that permanent life evolution that makes it so the homeless time of wandering wont' happen again. At least as much as anyone can control that.
This is the crazy part, the thing that is keeping me up.
It's over.
I did it, it just hasn't kicked in yet.
I put together a team and we have found some things that are going to change everything for us. And no, it's not one movie that is going to save the day. Yes I still work in that business, and yes I have movies/tv shows that are in my future. But this is something else.
I can't actually say specifically what it is, just that my team is continuing its Vett and we maybe on a 3 month window to permanent evolution.
The absolutely nuts part of this part is that so many other things are going crazy right now and could be seen as bad. More than that, whats really cool. Is that I am juggling a ton of different stress, and stressed out people. 6 months ago got me prepared for this time. I am growing and learning so much and it's paying off almost every week.
I am leading multiple teams, and groups of people through several different things. From business to family issues(that have never ever come up before, too strange.)
On the bad side, I don't live in my own house, I have no car, I have a suspended license, my cell phone is about to be shut off, and my girlfriend now lives 2 hours away from me. Cell phone is the latest thing, but I have a feeling that's going to be remedied soon. Everything else has been an issue that has been workable for months now. The girlfriend and I just had our 2 year anniversary and I couldn't be happier. Distance is being worked out! This bad side stuff is going to super gone in three months, I am fairly confident if not then very soon after that time frame.
All of this stuff is banging around in my head and I should be freaking out, but I just am not. I keep thinking about the color of the carpet in the office I am going to have...(am chuckling as I write this) I really want to do the Ogilvy &Mather classic English Red...maybe a deeper maroon...who knows. What a silly thing to keep you up until 4am.
When they ask me what the first thing I did was when this all happened, I will say "Got new carpet"
Wow, now I can't sleep because I want to get to work...
Why not, the future is really bright and so is this sunrise.
Tuesday, September 1, 2015
Downswing days
On a day like today it is important to keep perspective. It would appear on the surface by looking at the raw happenings of the morning that things have an negative bend to them.
Family issue's from last night that are states away that only I seem to be able to piece together solutions to....by pushing others to keep on caring and not saying the old "pray and walk away".
Professionally one of my directors once again getting physically upset that things are not stellar good news, just more business BS. Don't get me wrong I get it. It drives me crazy as well. I have some different reasons why it's driving me nuts in addition to the natural "we have good profitable product, and no one is buying" frustration.
Some people are already banking on my good fortune to help them (which is fine, I get that too) so every time nothing happens it is longer that people that are suffering needlessly in my mind are continuing to do so.
My health is going up and down, now I have some sort of serious un-diagnosed allergy that causes my tongue to swell up in my mouth while I am sleeping...joy. Yes, have been to a doctor, going to a specialist as soon as money allows. ER bills hurray!!
While I am writing this...no joke, collection agents super aggressive phone call on the phone that normally I don't pick up but picked it up because of the work I am doing now. When it rains it snows sometimes. Wow, got my heart rate up.
That's exactly the kind of thing I am talking about, that guy on the phone I could have just hung up on. Didn't have to engage, for some reason I engaged and he got me to get into an argument. Not the right move on my part, but I let my downswing effect keeping my eye on the ball(prize).
When I started this post, I had a positive buzz and was determined to move through the negative energy that was being spewed about at the creative breakfast I had this morning. Not all the directors, mostly circumstances that didn't equal result all around the table making for a bad vibe. People in the restaurant even where grumpy.
The point is!!!!
In baseball you don't connect with the ball on the downswing, so there is 'zero' chance to hit the ball at that point, so naturally your only focus should be at the most likely point to contact the ball to make some sort of hit, if your going to hit it at all.
Your downswing can effect where you swing, so where your connect and your likely hood to get a hit/homer. So it's important, if you start your downswing thinking your gonna wiff it, %99.9999 of the time you will. No matter how it feels you can't judge the swing as the batter until that bat is over the opposite shoulder, hit, homer or strike. The mentality before the upswing has gotta stay positive. Statistically your just more likely to connect!!
Family issue's from last night that are states away that only I seem to be able to piece together solutions to....by pushing others to keep on caring and not saying the old "pray and walk away".
Professionally one of my directors once again getting physically upset that things are not stellar good news, just more business BS. Don't get me wrong I get it. It drives me crazy as well. I have some different reasons why it's driving me nuts in addition to the natural "we have good profitable product, and no one is buying" frustration.
Some people are already banking on my good fortune to help them (which is fine, I get that too) so every time nothing happens it is longer that people that are suffering needlessly in my mind are continuing to do so.
My health is going up and down, now I have some sort of serious un-diagnosed allergy that causes my tongue to swell up in my mouth while I am sleeping...joy. Yes, have been to a doctor, going to a specialist as soon as money allows. ER bills hurray!!
While I am writing this...no joke, collection agents super aggressive phone call on the phone that normally I don't pick up but picked it up because of the work I am doing now. When it rains it snows sometimes. Wow, got my heart rate up.
That's exactly the kind of thing I am talking about, that guy on the phone I could have just hung up on. Didn't have to engage, for some reason I engaged and he got me to get into an argument. Not the right move on my part, but I let my downswing effect keeping my eye on the ball(prize).
When I started this post, I had a positive buzz and was determined to move through the negative energy that was being spewed about at the creative breakfast I had this morning. Not all the directors, mostly circumstances that didn't equal result all around the table making for a bad vibe. People in the restaurant even where grumpy.
The point is!!!!
In baseball you don't connect with the ball on the downswing, so there is 'zero' chance to hit the ball at that point, so naturally your only focus should be at the most likely point to contact the ball to make some sort of hit, if your going to hit it at all.
Your downswing can effect where you swing, so where your connect and your likely hood to get a hit/homer. So it's important, if you start your downswing thinking your gonna wiff it, %99.9999 of the time you will. No matter how it feels you can't judge the swing as the batter until that bat is over the opposite shoulder, hit, homer or strike. The mentality before the upswing has gotta stay positive. Statistically your just more likely to connect!!
Friday, August 28, 2015
Patterns, learning how to teach myself to improve on myself
Finding a rhythm in how you work the most effectively at anything that you have to do on a repeated basis seems to have a lot of merit. At least it does to me right now.
This is important because of how things seem to cycle in and out of a persons life. Now each person is different but I believe it is easy to draw some universal elements out of what I am saying. In the last week things got really really busy for about two days then settled down to a normal level, when they where at there peak of course a bunch of family and personal stuff kicked off as well.
Recognizing that this is a thing and seeing that getting really busy will also contribute to family stuff being more stressful because of the busy nature of the mindset already being worked to an extreme.
I have some really great examples in my life right now of people coming with multiple stress patterns at extreme levels and dealing with everything calmly and correctly. It has helped me be able to have success doing the same thing and really know what my own levels are and when I am tapped out and how much is my limit. Which is exciting because a I read something the other day that said that, "you can't pass your limits until you know what they are". This of course, has been very true for me lately and is part of the success of everything that is going on right now.
Just started on a new partnership relationship with an exciting company today, majority vote by partnership. Yesterday made a contact with a new company who will help execute on some projects coming down the pipeline.
Really, these patterns of work and growth are part of a greater pattern recognition in knowing the area's that I needed to learn more about myself in that where on my mind two years ago. I knew I needed to grow and so I took some chances and forced the situations to be the highest likelihood to teach me the things I needed to know.
Early on in my life I didn't realize that this was a purposeful thing but it has been deliberate more and more since my early 20's. Now it is part of my habits, to see an area that I am in need of change and engineer the world around me to maximize my ability to successfully change to meet that goal.
This is important because of how things seem to cycle in and out of a persons life. Now each person is different but I believe it is easy to draw some universal elements out of what I am saying. In the last week things got really really busy for about two days then settled down to a normal level, when they where at there peak of course a bunch of family and personal stuff kicked off as well.
Recognizing that this is a thing and seeing that getting really busy will also contribute to family stuff being more stressful because of the busy nature of the mindset already being worked to an extreme.
I have some really great examples in my life right now of people coming with multiple stress patterns at extreme levels and dealing with everything calmly and correctly. It has helped me be able to have success doing the same thing and really know what my own levels are and when I am tapped out and how much is my limit. Which is exciting because a I read something the other day that said that, "you can't pass your limits until you know what they are". This of course, has been very true for me lately and is part of the success of everything that is going on right now.
Just started on a new partnership relationship with an exciting company today, majority vote by partnership. Yesterday made a contact with a new company who will help execute on some projects coming down the pipeline.
Really, these patterns of work and growth are part of a greater pattern recognition in knowing the area's that I needed to learn more about myself in that where on my mind two years ago. I knew I needed to grow and so I took some chances and forced the situations to be the highest likelihood to teach me the things I needed to know.
Early on in my life I didn't realize that this was a purposeful thing but it has been deliberate more and more since my early 20's. Now it is part of my habits, to see an area that I am in need of change and engineer the world around me to maximize my ability to successfully change to meet that goal.
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